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Monday, October 19, 2009

Showing Up

I just returned from the Be Present Retreat held on the Oregon coast. 5 days spent with 24 women I had never met. As I packed up my bags I was nervous, excited, thrilled to be finally be headed for this retreat that I signed up for so long ago. I am really glad that I had to pay up front because as the date came closer and closer, I found myself questioning whether or not we could afford it, questioning if it was something that was REALLY important and being pretty nervous about being with a group of gals that I didn't know.


But I showed up:


I SHOWED UP!


and what I realize now is that I couldn't afford NOT to go. I couldn't keep continuing on the same path and be happy about where I was going. You know that expression.... "same shit, different day," well that is how my life started to feel. I needed to stir the pot. I needed to surround myself with like minded women who would get it. I simply just needed some time and space to unearth the creative spirit and flow within myself that has gotten a little buried in the process of raising a family.

With the support, love and encouragement of all the beautiful souls that were along with me on this journey, I feel like I have found myself again. The flicker of light that used to be quietly burning inside me is now starting to look like a flame that is burning brighter and stronger.


There is so much more to say, but finding the right words is hard right now. I'm still processing. but for now I'll say......
Thank you.


Thank you to each and everyone of the beautiful women who made this past week so powerful and amazing for me.


And thank you to myself for having the guts to show up!

9 comments:

K said...

so happy you did show up baby girl!!!! so happy you POSTED!!! i got so excited to read what you had to say! i am totally still processing everything...i think i have a million things zooming around in my crazy head! hopefully i can post about it all soon. missing you and your hugs and your beautiful, REALNESS! xoxoxox
Kolleen

chrissy said...

i will second that! i am so happy and blessed that you showed up too! i fell in love with you serena. you are an amazing woman with an amazing amount of talent. i love that you have already posted here. keep painting and keep close.
tons of love to you...
chrissy

liz elayne lamoreux said...

i too am so glad that you joined in on this adventure and showed up as your open and brave self.

(bravo girl)

i can't wait to see what unfolds for you and i hope we can get together soon...

elizabeth said...

I, too, am so glad you showed up. This post reminded me of the magic of the weekend - so thank you so much for that. I am still rather unable to put it into words myself.

I'm so glad you feel like your flame is burning brightly, because I could see it in you - and it inspired me.

So thank you! :)

Lori said...

I would NEVER have known it was scary for you to get there -- you seemed so comfortable with yourself and everyone else. And the creative spirit mixed in with your own spirit burns so very brightly. You're just beautiful.

Gloria said...

Hello dear friend...I am glad you showed up too...I love your energy and your strength...you were a true light...

judy said...

serena, you are an angel

Jennifer said...

I am so happy that you had the courage to show you. It was so nice having the opportunity to meet you. You are incredible. I hope you never forget to go for it, like you did with this retreat.

scrappy danielle said...

so happy you shared your bravery and creative love with us - any time you want to share a cyber glass o cheer with me to chat - just reach out and I'll be there...btw, I miss your random acts of singing. they made me smile!